O mito do guarda educador

Em uma mesa próxima, no pátio externo de alimentação do shopping, uma jovem mãe e seu marido inoperante torturavam seus dois filhos pequenos e a todos os humanos em volta com uma velha máxima da educação infantil: “não vai longe, senão eu chamo o guarda!”. Mais 30 segundos: “não vai lá, não faz isso, olha o guarda ali tá vindo, vou falar com ele!”

Você já deve ter ouvido, sido vítima ou até aplicado automaticamente essa pérola das relações entre genitores e filhos, cuja eficácia é quase sempre nula; ou negativa, porque os pivetes sacam já na terceira chamada que o tal guarda tem mais o que fazer do que atender aos fetiches dos pais e mães por fardas, cassetetes e outros apetrechos intimidatórios.

A redundante cantilena daquele casal invocando o guarda educador para os filhos fez-me sondar – além da ideia de ir comer no estacionamento – o substrato moral e simbólico desse gesto tão banal: quanto de machismo e de fascínio autoritário há nesse bordão? É sempre preciso um homem, se possível armado, para pôr ordem na casa"> 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